some things they should have rated R

how did they expose this to us when we were younger? HOW?! i don't think a night went by without me imagining malificent's green eyes in the dark with that eerie theme. that wh*%e of a woman ruined my life... and my parents'.

die.

"to die, to sleep - 

to sleep, perchance to dream - ay, there's the rub,

for in this sleep of death what dreams may come..."

william shakespeare, hamlet

thought of the day

i came across this on instagram and loved it. people don't realize that friends/partners etc are who they are because of all their experiences and the people they've met. everything has had an impact on our lives and personalities. there's no point in wanting to forget or ignore a part of someone's past, it's part of what you love in them today. oh instagram you know how to open my eyes ♥ 

xx

my littow black dress

it's very rare that i get clothes as a birthday gift, but this year a good friend of mine surprised me with this simple, chic and comfortable black dress. theres' nothing i need more than to feel comfortable in something i'm wearing! it's the perfect canvas for many different looks. so excited to wear it. thanks aiyoosh!

xx

go to junk fix!

my favorite go to junk fix when i need an artificial pick-me-up :)

i reunited with cadbury's fruit & nut after more than 5 years and i just can't believe how divine it is. i think about it a lot. mini m&ms are a must and the haribo cola gummies just remind me so much of my childhood i can't get enough. the lindt intense orange is my attempt at converting to a dark chocolate lover. a rather futile attempt, but i'm on my way. 

xx

time for the tree

how NOT to make your christmas tree look like a hot mess/junk yard. i apologize in advance if you were planning on going for any of these looks... just wondering, what were you thinking?

no seizure prone person should be within a 5 mile radius of this tree.  

 i don't think there's enough gingerbread here. 

 really, no one loved you, poor tree. 

i wouldn't be friends with the person who decorated this one.

a tree should be happy, peaceful, and classy in my opinion. it shouldn't give anyone anxiety. then again... 

happy decorating!

xx

mind over body

tres intéressant.

we always hear about the placebo effect and the power of mind over body, but it's cool to get some stats, more so via aussie accent:

plus-sea-buys 

(placebos)

in any case, if it works, why not... right?

LISTEN TO ME: where have you been jr blender reggae remix

?

****

i enjoy this so much more than the original. 

xx happy sunday!

zag expression

cairo diaries

i just came back from cairo where i was grateful to spend quality time with my father's side of the family. i got to meet up with some relatives i never really got the chance to talk to much when i was younger. my father's cousin sat me down and gave me the low down on my father's father's ancestry. turns out my father is mainly turkish and only partly egyptian through his mom and of course by default of growing up there. it doesn't make much of a difference in my life, but hearing about his great grandmother's journey to egypt from turkey was fascinating and one of the most interesting stories i've heard in a while. definitely script worthy. some day....

every time i go to egypt i get overwhelmed by the same feelings of nostalgia, happiness and disappointment. i'll always remember visiting more regularly when i was younger, spending weeks learning more about cairo as well as spending time with the whole family by the sea. i'm not only happy to be around family, but happy to explore the vast history which leads me to disappointment when i see the living situation that people have to endure as well as the insurmountable problems constantly on the rise. unfortunately, most of the time these problems do not find a solution.

egypt is so organized in its disorganization; the streets are a perfect example of this. i get anxiety attacks every time i'm in a car because i'm almost certain i'm about to die or someone else is. at one point, we had to rush my grandmother to the hospital and the amount of time it took us was disturbing. of course you're more aware of every detail and second wasted when someone's life is on the line - cars just randomly decide to stop halfway through a roundabout, people find that catching up in the middle of the street is normal and the traffic is always jammed. immense frustration is an understatement. we're grateful we got her to the hospital and everything turned out alright, but i have heard a lot of freak stories of people not making it to the hospital on time because of the road situation.

the photo above strangely enough depicts how i would describe egypt right now. figuratively, it's not in good shape, but there is hope, and literally, one of the few visual attributes that saves some areas is the greenery. i don't see myself ever living there, but it is a place i truly wish will improve.

xx

f the flu

i usually pride myself on being one who rarely falls sick. i'm generally healthy so i like to imagine that i walk around with some pretty strong immunity. i'm slowly finding this is not the case. 

i bumped into a friend who wasn't feeling well and sure enough i woke up the next day with a sore throat. you know when you constantly need to swallow, but every time you do it's painful? so unnecessary, i couldn't sleep.

i was however pretty excited to find oscillococcinum handy (it's kind of anal how they couldn't decide on a shorter name, no?). if you've never tried it make sure you always have it around and take it once you start noticing symptoms. apparently vitamin c has no value when you're sick? i still act like it does... cuz i could live on clementines. 

xx

today

is an animal print sort of day. whatever that means. 

xx

the nephew

my nephew zayd supporting the gaints. he doesn't know it yet, but he's a huge fan... 

xx

meet solitaire

my friend's cat is the feline dopellganger of the afghan girl.

we're all very proud.

xx

happy birthday me!

at 26-years, 1 week and 1 day i have to say that *drumroll* .....  i feel the same.

sorry to burst your bubble.

sure my social circle might have changed a little and i do have a couple ugly scars i wish i was able to avoid, but i don't really feel a day over 18. i had a great birthday that involved the sun, cocktails, delicious mexican food, cupcakes and of course great company :) out of the gifts i received, i was very happy with my new play-doh set and these two little stuffed penguins who have yet to be named. 

age is just a number. yes, i've reached the point where i use that line right left and center. on a daily basis. just let me be happy.

xx

a sleeping beauty ballet

i always manage to miss shows at the theatre in dubai. this one should be a treat. i always wanted to be a ballerina but hated the classes so i always get feelings of love and regret when i go to a ballet. needless to say, after black swan i'm pretty happy with my choice. 

xx

a pinkathon!

last friday i was fortunate enough to have good friends wake me up and share a very special occasion with me. the burjuman safe & sound pinkathon was taking place and even though it was just a 2k walk at a lousy 8:30am, it was full of energy and love for the cause. having very dear ones of mine lose their life to the disease has made it a very sentimental experience and is something i want to be a part of forever.

despite the exuberant event, something was brought to my attention - the rise of the general angst towards breast cancer awareness initiatives. the documentary pink ribbons was dedicated to highlighting the faults that society undeniably has regardless of the act of kindness it's attempting to promote. if you think about it, breast cancer awareness has become somewhat of a business - any corporation that happens to associate itself with it manages to have their marketing approach down and attain the desired reach. is it strictly philanthropic and for the good of the cause? do all the profits really go to awareness and research, or is it just a small portion. is it helping?

i like to believe that while yes, corporations might be abusing the ribbon, people are becoming more aware and interested in taking their own initiatives, be it raising money or promoting check-ups. corporations might be "stealing" the proceeds, but as long as they are still donating to the cause, i'd rather that over nothing. i haven't done as much research as i should have to make judgements and my perspective might alter greatly after watching the documentary, but it's something to think about.

xx

love lessons from a couple who know

i was truly touched by this article by a couple who lived through a 73-year marriage. people who think love and relationships are easy haven't truly lived through one. the more you open your eyes to your personal relationships and those around you, you realize that as loving as they are, they do require work and a whole lotta compromise. it's just up to you to decide whether that person is worth the emotional investment as not many people are worth the effort. as long as the pros outweigh the cons i believe it's worth it. 

my favorite points:

- embrace his quirks: you cannot fall in love with blue eyes and perfect teeth. you have to fall in love with the character of the person.

- move on from rows: my most important lesson was that we did not rehash. if something was unpleasant we got through it, handled the fallout, and did not bring it up again in happier times.

- trust your feelings: you shouldn't have to question whether you feel a physical attraction. 

- knowing attraction can last: we discovered that as our bodies grew fatter or skinnier, as we lost hair or grew it in peculiar places, our attraction stayed intact. 

xx happy loving

LISTEN TO ME: ellie goulding - anything could happen

stripped to the waist we fall into the river

cover your eyes so you don't know the secret

i've been trying to hide

****

i've been hearing this quite a bit on the radio. i'm not sure if it's gotten to the point where it's grown on me because the stations here manage to play the same 5 songs on repeat, or if i genuinely like it. but i like it. a lot.

happy monday! 

xx

going backless

3 things i'm automatically attracted to in a dress:

1. lace

2. black

3. backless

this dress embraces the feminine- it highlights a lean body, but defines the curves. 

xx